After my divorce, I moved in with my parents for a year. I brought with me my helper and Asher. 3 of us slept in my spacious room. I couldn't bring much stuff with me so I had some stuff stored at my aunt’s place. Everything was good except that the room has became very warm unlike 2 decades earlier (think global warming has been evident) and mozzies were still an issue after so long. It felt good to live with my parents and I felt the warmth of a family again. It started off with a few conflicts where Asher had a tough time adapting to his new school and he fell sick. Even when he had recovered he refused to go to school. I was pretty insistent that he was not absent often as the principal told me that getting him to go to school consistently would enable him to adapt faster. I was also worried that with him around at home he would impose on my parents. I had a fight with my dad one day when Asher pulled up another excuse for not going to school and my dad gave in to him. He scolded me for forcing things on Asher. I felt that he was spoiling him. On hindsight, I felt that I was rushing Asher through the processing of adapting and had worried too much about him missing school. I think I was taking life too hard on others and myself. Asher eventually adapted to his new school, though he really hated the Chinese teacher (whom I hated too).
So the next big thing that happened to me was getting a house on my own. It took about 6 months to find a place in Ubi (close to my parents and Asher’s primary school). I wanted a 4-room corner and high floor unit. These units were selling like hotcakes and it was really a matter of first-come-first-serve with the best price. It was a stressful period as I was worried that the area would run out of such units for sale. I was ready to come to a compromise with low level units and corridor flats. But I knew that my prayers were heard when my friend-agent Choon, had a lead and it was given to me prior to the public. It was a corner flat at the highest level. The conditions weren’t great but it was an ideal location. And I wouldn’t mind having my own design.
I found a very reliable contractor through my colleague, Paul and the renovation went pretty well. I was proud of myself with my purchases from Taobao and the designs and colours that I had chosen. I could finally have my own say in everything. Well, having a spouse helps to bear the cost but you have to come to a compromise with the designs he had chosen. In the past, I really hated the big bulky furniture that he purchased and the house became more and more cluttered.
It was a very busy year trying to settle A’s onboarding to the primary school, house reno, moving and stuff. I was really overwhelmed by the year end but I’m very thankful for my family and friends who supported me throughout. My aunts offered their place to store my stuff and got their hands down with the move. One of them also chipped in to relieve my expenses. My parents put us up and took care of us. My friend Julin offered to foster Ah Boy and Xiaowa and took care of them really well. My friend, Shaoxian gave me a hand in the move to my parent’s with his lorry. And of course Mr Loo helped me with rounds of move so that I could save up on movers. I couldn’t give my helper a proper increment since last year because I told her I was not financially stable. I’m glad that she continued to stay on and supported me through this phase of life. In return, I gave her some bonuses this month. I couldn’t have done all these myself.
I moved in Dec 2023 and I got Mr Loo to live with me. He needs a proper place and eat proper homecooked meals.
The year ended with me settled down, ready for the next phase of my life.
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